1.
NetBIOS - Enabled by default
WINS - Requires you to get a server, install the service and set everyone up to use it
2.
WINS, as a server, can only be installed under the server OS, so 2003 has it as an option (as does 2008). You're right though, manual installation.
Both XP and 2003 can use WINS as a client to help them with NetBIOS name resolution (not all servers would need the WINS server itself installed).
3.
Separate WINS server.
In a simple way WINS is like DNS. It's a server with a list of names, and it can reply to clients with those. WINS, in the same way as DNS, must be installed as a service for anyone to make use of it.
Chris